The teams are set, the groundskeepers are trying to make their parks look as ostentatious as possible, “fans” are dusting off hats they haven’t worn all summer, and there’s a chill in the air as Tim McCarver practices up on basic English phrases in a surely vain attempt to not embarrass himself for the umpteenth year in a row. Playoff baseball is here.
While the rest of the blogging triumvirate fills you in on other details, I’ll give you a brief rundown on teams’ strengths. Put another way, I’ll tell you what they should do in order to win, since some teams won’t do it, and will lose.
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Angels – Much is made of the Angels’ “National League” style of baseball and Mike Scioscia’s game management. But they’re aging. Their pitching is nothing short of totally suspect. What do the Angels have that no one else has?
The Angels are, dare I say it, a blue-collar team in a tinsel-collared town. The middle of the order is crammed with veteran hitters with decent pop and plenty of late-inning match up problems. Boring, and obvious, but as long as half the lineup shows up to play, the Angels will pound their opponents into the ground.
I can’t believe I just called the Angels a blue-collar team.
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Yankees- On paper, the Pinstripers are clearly the favorite in the American League. Listing their strengths would probably be redundant. But some Yankees (Sabathia, Rodriguez) have downright atrocious playoff stats, Derek Jeter’s only one man, and Mariano Rivera is only good from the 8th inning on. What do the Yanks have to no one else has?
Chemistry. The Yankees have great team chemistry for a team of overpaid prima donnas. They play hard, they slide hard, they pitch inside, they celebrate as a team, and it shows in the stat column; they lead the league in wins and walk-off wins. If the Yankees get out the gate clean, they’re a formidable force.
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Red Sox- The Sawx, as always, hold the unenviable advantage of the most obnoxious and ignorant fans in all of professional sports, outdoing French soccer hooligans and women’s billiards enthusiasts. They also have rings, Terry Francona and Jonathon Papelbon, and the worst home park in the Majors. But everyone knows how to play Fenway by now, Francona is going to have gum cancer next week, and good closers are common in the playoffs. What do the Red Sox have that no one else has?
Enough good starting pitching, even though it doesn’t look like it. Beckett is unhittable in the playoffs, and Lester’s been great all year. With one and two set, the Sox can (and I look for them to) use Byrd and Buchholz perhaps a duo, and mix in Wakefield as needed. And then cycle back to the beginning. Paul Byrd has a fresh arm and has good playoff numbers. If the Sox get wins from Beckett and a healthy Lester, they’ll be tough to beat.
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Twins- The Twins are hot, winning 17 out of 21 to snatch the Central Division from the declawed Motor City Kitties. And they have the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome, the hardest place in which to play baseball on the road in October, period. But their pitching is tired and they are going to be hung over in the Bronx. Where is their strength?
This is a weak team that looked pretty bad against Detroit. If they win, it’s because they play mistake-free baseball and have Ron Gardenhire on the bench.
National League
I’m going to be totally honest, I don’t watch a lot of nor care for JV baseball. But I’ll give it a shot here.
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Phillies- At the risk of being overly simple, the Phils have a similar team to last year’s best-in-baseball squad, except they added Cliff Lee and Ryan Madson this year. Add to that that Charlie Manuel hates being knocked off a pedestal. The Phillies are good.
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Cardinals- The Cards play in St. Louis and are therefore endangered by their mere proximity to the horrendous Rams. How will they possibly succeed?
By playing boring baseball. Two excellent starters in Carpenter and Wainwright are a formidable threat, especially in the first round. An American League-style lineup, a solid bullpen, and a proven winner with La Russa…what else do you want?
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Rockies- The Rockies somehow have good pitching this year. But no Matt Holliday, which means all runners will probably have to touch the plate on their way to the dugout if they want their runs to count. What will it take for the Rockies to sneak around the Phillies?
Hitting the snot out of the ball. The Rockies know better than to count on their pitching, ever. They need to hit like an American League team, which means Tulowitzki can’t be AWOL like in ’07.
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Dodgers- Two LA teams in the post season is the second worst thing about baseball (besides two New York teams, or New York and Boston teams.) Manny is slumping. The Dodgers have to compete with Lakers preseason practice towel-tossing locations for press coverage. What will the Dodgers do?
Ride the J.T.’s all the way to the NLCS. Joe Torre and Jim Thome, that is. And Manny, the career playoff home run leader, will help. Jim Thome is 17-for-233 in the post season. Just for home runs. That works out to .00072…which looks a lot like A-Rod’s batting average of .071 in the ’06 post season loss to the Tigers. Just for home runs, mind you.
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Thus I must venture outlandish predictions and justify them with one sentence apiece:
Divisional Series
AL. Twins stun the Yankees in four. I just like the sound of it. Angels throw the rally monkey off their backs and beat the Sox in four.
NL. Phillies stomp the Rockies into sand and sweep them away. Cardinals beat down the Dodgers despite Thome’s seven solo home runs in series.
Championship Series
AL. Twins run out of luck in the ALCS; Angels in six.
NL. Pujols catches fire and leads Cards to dramatic game seven win against Phillies in NLCS.
World Series
Cardinals are just too good for Angels, win in six. Milton Bradley throws temper tantrum. Joe Buck cries of happiness and gets fired from Fox, so no one has to hear him ever again. Craig Sager moves to the booth so no one is forced to regard his heinous wardrobe choices.
Filed under: The On-Deck Circle
Major League Baseball’s winter meetings is one of the most exciting times of the year for baseball fans. All of the powers that be in baseball, the GM’s, some owners, the agents, the media, scouts, players, bloggers, all convene in one hotel and go nuts. The rumors are endless, player will get signed, traded, and rule 5 drafted. Most of the meetings are just one giant tease, but that’s one of the most exciting parts. Late last night, there was a huge rumor about a 3-way trade with Curtis Granderson and the Yankees. Fun while it lasted, but it’s pretty much dead right now. If you’re interested in following the winter meetings, check out MLBTraderrumors.com. It is the place to be, up to the minute updates on any and every rumor. I also recommend checking out Craig Calcaterra over at Circling the Bases at NBC. He’s a former lawyer turned full time baseball blogger. If you’re a fan of baseball and you’ve got a favorite team, then the winter meetings will fullfill your baseball fix this week. Hopefully I can be at next years if I can find a job working for a team.
With the Phillies beating the Dodgers, there will no longer be any playoff baseball games on TBS (they are the ones that know comedy, not drama..duh). Fox is the only network left, and as the Yankees take on The The Angels of The Angels, we must put TBS to sleep. Maybe this is just me, but I felt like there were about, oh I don’t know, 8 commercials that ran over and over and over and over again. Well TBS, in your attempt to brainwash us, I’ve learned quite a bit about life…
4. There is something magical that has entered the marketplace. I never knew I was waiting for this, but I now know what I have been missing. The best part? Shhhh…..pepperjack sauce….black taco anyone?
11. Erik Estrada, I feel bad for you. I’d buy your glasses though because they are sweet. Eeeeestraaaaaada.
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